The Price Of Speed

I heard a rumor. I don't usually comment on rumors, but the source is pretty informed and reliable and has no history of relaying bad information.

It seems that some ISPs are going to start identifying "bandwidth hogs" (users who do a lot of downloading, uploading, streaming of video and audio, etc...), throttle their available bandwidth, and then inform them that they can reclaim their original performance for an additional premium.

Say what? For example -- If I pay WhizBag Cable $40 a month, I get about 1 MB per second download speed no matter what I do or how much I use the service. I'm a higher end user, so I stream video (think CNN, YouTube...) and download music. A lower level user is paying the same $40 a month, but only uses email and occasionally surfs the web.

Of course the price that the lower end user pays will not go down, but in order to continue using the bandwidth that I've been paying for, I now have to pay a premium as the penalty for making full use of what was available to me. Apparently my usage has been subsidised by the folks who don't use the Internet as much.

The argument was made that it's going to be like the Turnpike -- the more you drive, the more you pay. That analogy doesn't work for me -- even if it's applicable from a certain point of view. I just see this as yet another way to be nickel and dimed to death by the service providers (any service). I realize this is all an intrinsic part of free market capitalism, but it doesn't mean it's right.

Tell Me A Story

A friend and blogger bud recently posted about the thief who lives in all of our homes and steals our time -- that thief being the television. I must confess a mild addiction to the damn thing, but in all honesty I enjoy a good, well-told story. And since I don't know any real storytellers of the oral tradition, I read, watch TV, and go to the movies.

Whether many of the stories being told deserve our time and attention, let alone airtime, is another matter completely.

But a thief? You cannot, sir, take anything from me that I will more willingly part withal...except my life... - Hamlet Act II, Scene ii

In my case it's my time and attention, not my life -- even though I'm willingly parting with little slices of my life to sit sedentarily and tan my retinas in the glow of the television's CRT. How many hours? It depends on the time of year and what's on. Summertime is great because I don't have to schedule my life around a half a dozen (or more) shows that I want to see -- although TiVo lets me watch the shows when I want, I still need to carve out the time.

I sometimes deliberately avoid what looks like good quality programming so I won't get roped into yet another good story. At least I know myself. If I see the pilot episode and enjoy it, I'm probably hooked. If I make it a point to miss the pilot, then I can rationalize not ever watching it again.

It's kind of like my mindset about going to the movies. Get me to a movie after its already started, even just five minutes, and you won't get me into the theater. I want the full experience or none at all. And yes, I'm one of those people that watches the credits -- all of them. And no, it's not because I'm looking for my second cousin's name who's a Key Grip.

Matt Who?

A friend sent me this link to the website Where The Hell Is...Matt?
I confess that I'm not exactly sure what this project is all about other than maybe that dancing guy on the Internet.

But I guarantee it will bring a smile -- and who can't use more of those?

No Punch Line

I love to laugh, but the world has just gotten a little less funny. So it is with great sadness that I lament the death of one of the greatest comedic geniuses of our time, George Carlin.

The Media is filled with the reports as well as snippets of his humor and insights. I won't redirect to every last one of them, but I will post one of his recent bits about the things that bring us together. Of course, in typical Carlin fashion, the language is not suitable for Sunday Brunch with the family. You've been warned.

Clean Freak

My wife and I were fired today -- not from our jobs; by our cleaning woman. Why? Apparently we were just too much trouble to please. We had the audacity to ask for certain things to be addressed -- specifically the blinds and ceiling fans -- that she wasn't willing to do, despite her initially agreeing to do them.

But that wasn't the impression we got when we hired her. Actually, the first impression we got was that we returned home after the initial cleaning to find that she had broken our house. Okay....just the bathroom. The door to the powder room has an extremely tight tolerence (like the thickness of a dollar bill) between it and the sink. She somehow managed to inadvertantly body-slam the sink and pull it out of its mounting that held it flush with the wall.

So now the door hits the sink every time it's opened. She denied it at first, but then admitted it. Don't worry, I'm bonded. Fine. We agreed that we'd try to take care of it, but let her know if we weren't successful -- at which time her bonding would come into play.

In any case, she told us at the outset of our brief relationship, Just let me clean the way I clean. I promise you'll be happy. Well...she continued to do things that we felt were unnecessary while leaving incomplete the couple things that were important to us. Were we out of line? It's not like she was doing us any favors. We were paying for this service. Shouldn't we feel free to slightly tailor the service to our situation?

"No", it seems, is the answer. Although she had asked us to leave notes with any special requests, those notes -- although, I presume, read and understood -- were never acted upon. So when she called to change the cleaning day from Thursday to Friday for this week, my wife called her back and left a message that we needed to discuss the items that weren't being addressed.

That's when Tina's sister (yes, the Putzfrau's real name is Tina) called my wife and informed her -- rudely -- that our business relationship had reached an end. Though she didn't say in so many words, the jist was that we're too much trouble and we make unreasonable requests. Say what? "Is this how you want to handle this?", my wife asked Donna (Tina's sister who we didn't even know existed before she made the phone call that Tina wouldn't).

And now we're Putzfraulos. It's likely we would have released her anyway since we were paying for service that didn't satisfy us, but the fact that she left us in a lurch the day before she was to clean for us compelled me to take up the mantle of Instant Karma.

I called Tina and left her a message (she rarely answers her phone) that we would now like her to take care of the bathroom sink that she savaged. She's bonded, she broke it, she admitted it, and now she needs to make it right. I'm not sure just how far I'm willing to take this. I know a couple guys that could probably fix my sink in an hour and charge me nothing but dinner, but I feel like rattling her cage a bit for the crime of child-like behaviour and unprofessionalism.

Whether she steps up and does the right thing or plays duck and cover remains to be seen. In either case, we'll be screening a bit more carefully the next cleaning service we let into our home.

Drilling Bits

At the behest of our President, it is now before Congress to decide whether or not to lift the ban on offshore drilling -- so that we can take the befouling of our aquatic ecosystems to a whole new level in the name of reducing Americans' pain at the pumps. So what if we'd be eroding wetlands, contaminating the water with chemicals, polluting the air, killing fish, and dumping waste, right?

We want cheap gas, dammit! And as Americans, isn't it our birthright to have every convenience, no matter the cost? "There's no excuse for delay", our GOP President has said (Is GOP the acronym for the Gas and Oil Party?).

Well....have you got three to five years? That's the realistic delay between the start of offshore drilling and the actual delivery of that fuel to the gas pumps. Where are gas prices going to be then? How about spending the next three to five years ramping up the development of alternative fuels? Improving and expanding our public transportation? Anyone?

I've previously made references to Europe on this subject because they're paying more than twice what we are to fill up. In all fairness, however, they were forward-thinking enough to lay the groundwork years ago with more fuel efficient vehicles and better public transportation. We're playing catch-up and we don't like it. We want quick convenient fixes and we expect our government to wave its magic sceptre and make the bad things go away.

It's time to wake up and smell what we're trying to scrape off the bottom of our shoes. The demand for oil will only increase -- especially in the BRIC nations [Brazil, Russia, India, China] -- so we need to decrease our demand as soon as possible. Putting a short to mid-term band aid on the problem that could decrease the urgency to develop alternative fuel sources isn't the answer.

Six dollars a gallon? Bring it on. I'll pay it. I won't like it, but if I know it's temporary and there's an end in sight I'll manage. I'll also be more likely to drive less often, carpool if possible, ride public transportation, walk, and conserve in general.

I'm hoping Congress does the right thing and leaves the ban in place. Our planet shouldn't have to suffer further to pay for our impatience and lack of vision.

Down (and Out) Sizing

Today was a Dark Monday -- not because of weather or any celestial event. The company let three people go today. One of our sister companies -- owned by the same conglomerate -- laid off a half a dozen good employees.

Apparently the new term is "rightsizing". I'm certain it was anything but right for the folks who were shown the door after ten plus years of service. They did nothing wrong, but in today's environment that's immaterial since there is no longer any such thing as "job security". In fact, that quaint old notion should probably be removed from the American lexicon. It disappeared by the end of the 70s if I'm not mistaken.

Unfortunately, the corporations have to bend in order to avoid being broken by the current economic landscape. In the case of my employer, it means cutting off fingers to save the hand. In my case, I'm holding out hope that I may be one of the prehensile thumbs that they just can't grasp the business without.

Third Sunday In June

Friday The 13th

Oooooohh....Friday the 13th.

I don't know how many of you are paraskevidekatriaphobic, but if it makes you feel any better, Friday the 13th isn't -- and hasn't been -- any more unlucky than any other day of the year unless you happened to be a Templar Knight in 1307 when Philip IV of France had most of them killed.

There now, don't you feel better? -- a service I am only too happy to provide.

Nature Flexed

Did you get those bad storms and wind last night? Here in parts of the Northeast, around 8 o'clock, we had 60 to 80 mph gusts that pushed our neighbor's birch tree over and onto our roof and new fence.

So I took the day to deal with the neighbor, the insurance company, the fence people, and the tree removal service. It's going pretty well. The owner (next door) called a tree service and they were here at 7:30 this morning with a cherry picker. By 8:30 they were gone and so was the birch tree. An hour ago, a different crew showed up and ground the stump. Twenty minutes later, all that remained of the thirty foot birch was a large divot-shaped scar in the neighbor's yard.

A bit sad, really. I know for a fact that the winged residents of the property had a fondness for that tree. And it was a nice part of the view from the deck.

The roof is fine. The fence isn't destroyed -- and the damage is relatively minor. We'll want the panel replaced that was bent, but I can do that myself since the posts don't need to be re-sunk and we can pick up a replacement panel inexpensively. It could be worse (can't it always?).

This all made for a very exciting dining experience last night since I was in the middle of grilling salmon on the deck right next to where the tree leaned over. We then laughed in the face of death by eating dinner as usual as the fallen tree loomed menacingly outside the dining room window. My rationalization was that we'd hear the fence breaking if the tree were going to come down any further and thusly have time to get out of the way with the dinner service intact.

I'm thrilled that my theory wasn't put to the test.

Quotable

"The United States economy is like a poker game where the chips have become concentrated in fewer and fewer hands, and where the other fellows can stay in the game only by borrowing. When their credit runs out, the game will stop."

-Marriner Eccles
Chairman, Federal Reserve
1931 - 1934

Mercury

The temperature at 5PM today as reported by my vehicle. Ouch.

More Racing Kudos

This post comes courtesy of a fellow racing fan and reader, KaiserMichi:

BMW won their first ever Formula One Grand Prix yesterday - their first ever as a stand-alone team, that is. Nevertheless, it was won by Robert Kubica, a young man from Poland who is one helluva driver. So yesterday´s Grand Prix not only saw the first win by BMW, but also added the twentieth national anthem, the Polish anthem, to their repertoire. By the way, Kubica is also leading the driver´s standings. Ferrari leads the Constructeurs table, but only by two or three points.

As I had said in my post about the Indianapolis 500, I love auto racing but rarely can make the time to enjoy it. I still occasionally daydream about piloting a Ferrari around the circuit at Monaco, but for now, I'll have to make due with an AWD Mercedes driven barely within the boundries of legality.

Maybe in another life.

Red Shirt

Cringeworthy Credit

We only have a couple credit cards and we like it that way. Years ago, I almost got into trouble with several cards of my own and it was a couple years paying them off and reducing the number of accounts. Now I have one plus my bank card and my wife has two. One of her cards -- an old one she's had for years -- only has a $300 limit. We almost never use it, so we figured it was time to increase the credit limit or close the account.

We can sneeze $300. That's not meant as a conceit or to sound like I'm gloating (I'm not). We're not rich -- we're middle class. It's just that $300 is really not a useful amount of money to us when we could pull the same from our checking or savings and not owe the interest. In the event of an "emergency", it would have to be a modest one to be handled by a mere $300 in today's world. A $1000 limit seemed like a fair increase request based on her standing as a long-time good customer.

So we called customer service to put in the request. Not surprisingly, the toll free number we dialed connected us to the Philippines. The exchange was difficult, to say the least. Our representative, Mai, certainly spoke much better English than our Filipino, but the frustration wasn't because of the language barrier.

We were informed that they could approve a $100 increase "at this time", but we were welcome to call back and request additional increases. I tried to explain that throwing us a bone in the form of such a small increase was practically a waste of time. Couldn't we talk to anyone who could approve a larger increase all at once? No.

Maybe I'm not as clear on all this credit crap as I think I am. Don't they want to extend people credit? Isn't that how they make money? Or are we now what Big Credit considers "deadbeats" (customers who don't make Big Credit money on late and over-limit charges) because we pay in a timely fashion and don't draw out modest purchases with minimum payments for several years?

Then the other penny dropped. We had agreed to the increase thinking that we'd call back later and try to get someone else or a supervisor to assist us. ...And there will be a $25 charge for your increase and you'll see that on your next bill. Exqueeze me? Baking powder? We have to pay $25 to get a $100 increase and we haven't even used the card? Do the math. We could conceivably run up $175 in charges by calling back for enough $100 increases to get to our $1000 limit.

Thanks, but no thanks. My wife's other card gives her regular credit increases just for being a good customer -- at no charge. Maybe Big Credit isn't inherently evil across the board, but I could see where this particular minion was going to get their two cents whether we used the card or not.

We left the card alone for now -- no credit increase and no cancellation. We'd had all the customer service we could handle. It wasn't Mai's fault. She's working and doing her job and in all likelyhood, reading from a script. A script whose plot favors either the rich or the poor, in my opinion.

The rich get the best offers because Big Credit desperately wants them to use their money for the bigger things in life and the poor are goldmines because they're a good bet to get behind and over their limit (fees and more fees) and end up paying many times the value of small purchases by dragging them out for years with minimum payments.

Here I am, stuck in the middle with you. It's okay though, saving for a few months and paying cash the old fashioned way makes for a better night's sleep.

One A Day

I'm a Scotch drinker. I'm not certain exactly how that came about, but I think I got there by way of a friend who first introduced me to Cognac -- the better varieties of which aren't too different from single malt scotch...at least as far as my palette is concerned (doubtless to the horror of true scotch purists).

An interesting bit of trivia: If it's from Scotland, it's Scotch (but people from there are Scots). The Irish make Whiskey and in America it's called Bourbon. It's basically the same drink made in different places.

My first taste of Scotch was probably when I was in my late teens or early twenties. It was a blend. I was certain I would never drink it again after it went down like paint thinner. People enjoy this? My throat felt like I had been gargling with drain cleaner.

The Cognac was a very different experience. It had a bite, but not the angry claws of the blended liquors. Remy Martin XO and Louis XIII emerged as two of my favorites.

Years later at a band practice, our bassists father offered us drinks and opened up his Scotch cabinet. I cringed. I didn't want to be rude or prude, but I could feel my throat constricting as he poured us all a glass. That which does not kill us, makes us strong. -- Nietzsche

I took a sip and... <insert Beethoven's "Ode to Joy" here>

Um....what kind of Scotch is this? I don't remember what he said other than "single malt". Ahh...vive la difference. I had no idea there was Scotch that was this....well....good. The next time I found myself in a bar, I ordered one for myself. Sure, Pal...what kind?

Oops. I new nothing about Scotch other than I liked it. My mind raced. All I could think of was the scene in Highlander where Christopher Lambert orders a drink. Glenmorangie, please.

I had chosen wisely. It was smooth with earthy aromas and a nice finish. Since then, I've experimented with several others -- The Glenlivet (at least the 15 year old, if you please), The Macallan, The Dalmore.... Glenmorangie has a cool motto: Crafted by the 16 Men of Tain. I have no idea what that means, but I like it.

So I've taken to having a glass (two if I'm being indulgent) every day. If I had to justify it, I'd say that it's been shown that a drink or two a day for men over 40 helps reduce the risk of heart attack -- along with other benefits. But that's not why I drink it.

It's been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues. - Abraham Lincoln

Historic

He made history last night.

Will he make it again in November?

My crystal ball is still in Beta testing, but I'm thinking Yes. If it were to come down to the strength of his oratory, he should just be sworn in immediately.

My feelings are mixed. I believe the country is just as ready for a black president as it is for a woman. I think Hillary's would have been a remarkable presidency. Think about it -- The President and the First Gentleman, who would also rightly be addressed as "Mister President".

Frankly, in the state that the country is in now, it may have been a huge advantage to have two presidents in the White House. Maybe that would help get things done in half the time. Regardless of anyone's opinions of the Clintons, they are very good at the business of government and getting things done.

But the fat lady is only warming up. Will Hillary be asked to serve as Vice President? If so, then she's almost a shoe-in in 2016 if Obama has a popular presidency. If not, she could still conceivably run again. Why not? Nixon did it. After losing to Kennedy in 1960, he came back to get elected to our highest office in 1968.

Time will tell. Until then, I'll look forward to casting my vote and watching history unfold.

Going Back For Seconds: Part 2 - The Answer

So the question of the $50 and $75 fuel-up cut-off has been de-mystified.

It seems that the $50/75 limit is imposed because that's what Visa and Mastercard (and other credit card issuers) will reimburse gas stations for fraudulent gasoline purchases. My fictitious scenario of a stolen card fueling up an entire convoy wasn't as far from the mark as I thought.

This really isn't all that surprising. Of course Big Credit will protect itself at all costs. If it inconveniences the rest of us in the least, well -- they could care less. And I'm confident that Big Oil would back them on this even though they are in a win/win situation regardless of gas purchases being legit or fraudulent.

The bar needs to be raised. Actually, the bar needs to be razed, but that's definitely not going to happen. The $100 fill-up is now a reality for a lot of vehicles and I can't imagine that the risk to Big Credit would be more than negligible to at least lessen our time at the pump if not our pain.

Twins

I'm a Gemini. We're flighty. So today I'm taking off. I'll leave you the video of my favorite song from the most brilliant concept album ever made. From 1979, this is the video of Pink Floyd's Comfortably Numb from "The Wall".